The Modern Day Caveman

After a day spent with family yesterday, Day 19 was much the same.

The day started with a lovely cooked breakfast courtesy of my mum. She’s certainly been looking after me since I moved back home!

The rest of the day consisted of a family walk, followed by a stop at the pub (that’s becoming too much of a regular occurrence!) before heading back home to watch some classic British TV: Only Fools and Horses.

I’ve really enjoyed spending quality time with my parents since moving back. Granted, it’s not always easy living under the same roof again, but I think spending time with your parents as an adult, when you’re a little more mature than in your teenage years, is seriously underrated.

As I mentioned yesterday, I did feel a little guilty about not being more productive on my Sunday, but I did manage to tick a few small things off.

One thing I think I should mention – if I’m being honest with myself and you, dear readers – is that I’ve had a bit of a wobble this past week with gambling.

If I’m being fully transparent, I ended up gambling away nearly all of my birthday money. It started as a bit of fun, a harmless flutter to pass the time, but before I knew it, it was gone – and with it came that familiar wave of regret I’d promised myself I was done feeling.

At the time, I justified it because it wasn’t money earned from work or sales on eBay, but the truth is, I just feel angry, frustrated, and filled with regret.

It’s a setback, and not one I’m proud of. But talking it through last night and having an honest conversation with myself actually felt like a pivotal moment, reminding me that recovery and growth aren’t linear.

Metrics

• Steps: 13,351
• Garmin Stress Score: 38
• Mental Health Rating: 5/10
• Remaining Debt: £39,781.83

Food Log

• Breakfast: Poached eggs, avocado, mushrooms, tomatoes, toast
• Lunch: Egg fried rice, halloumi, ‘dirty’ fries, spring roll
• Dinner: Noodles, Quorn ham roll
• Snacks: Sweets

It’s not easy admitting when you slip up, but I’m realising that honesty is the first step to getting back on track. I can’t change what’s happened, but I can control what I do next – and that’s exactly where my focus will be.